Snug as bugs

I wish I could be this comfortable when we go for walks around town...but then I wouldn't get much exercise, would I?

It is such a process for us to get out the door in the first place. We need jackets, hats and gloves. We need water bottles for Emma and Henry...'cause you know how thirsty all that lounging comfortably can make you! We need two pairs of kids shoes underneath the stroller just in case they want to get out from their cocoons. We need wallet, cell phone, garage opener and wipes in the little pouch on the stroller. We need plenty of bags for Molly so she can take care of business while we are out. Oh, and I have to have my camera with me - you never know what interesting things we might see. Then, just as I think we are ready to go, Emma notices that I am wearing sunglasses so of course she needs her Hello Kitty sunglasses. I run upstairs to try and locate said sunglasses and while I am at it, I better find Henry's too - he wants whatever Emma wants these days.

We are finally off!

No-bake baking with Emma

Emma and I have so much fun baking together. Emma has always loved to help me in the kitchen, though until recently, her helping usually meant that everything took at least twice as long and that the clean up was a monumentous task. Now Emma is actually honest-to-goodness helpful! One of our favorite things to "no-bake bake" are these chocolate balls. They are a staple in any Swedish home with children so why not in ours as well? Emma rolled the balls in the sugar all by herself - she's very patient when she wants to be. Don't you think she did a fabulous job?

1 stick of butter

1/2 cup sugar

1 tbsp vanilla sugar (or a couple of drops of vanilla extract)

2-3 tbsp cocoa powder

1 1/2 cups oatmeal

2-3 tbsp cold coffee (optional)

Pearl sugar (a Swedish phenomenon that can be found in some American grocery stores) or coconut

Cream butter, sugar and vanilla. Mix in cocoa powder. Add oatmeal and coffee, if desired. Stir until well blended. Shape mixture into little balls and roll them in pearl sugar or coconut. Let stand in refrigerator until firm.

ENJOY!

Ballet

Emma loves her ballet class. It is the one activity she continues to go to. Since Emma has not gone to preschool since October, when she was diagnosed, it is so much fun for her to have some structured "class time" with other kids.

A few weeks back there was an open house for parents to see what the little girls had learned at ballet so far. Unfortunately Emma had chemo therapy in the morning of the open house day. I didn't think we would be going to ballet at all but when I talked to Emma about it she really wanted to be there, even though she was obviously very tired. Emma would not wear a tutu (which is extremely unusual for her - like any 3 year-old she normally loves tutus!) and came to sit in my lap during much of the class. Even so, I think she had a great time. As a mom, it was impossible to not smile (and get a little emotional) through the entire "show" these little girls put on - they were so precious!

Farmor

This is my grandmother. Wasn't she beautiful? I went to Sweden for her funeral a few weeks back. Although I was very glad to be able to be there, it was also, obviously, very hard. I was always very close to my father's mother. I have written about her before. I will miss her so much - I still don't really understand that she is gone. Since I have lived so far away from her for so many years and only seen her once or twice a year, it makes it even more unreal. I think it will truly hit me when we go for our annual summer trip to Sweden this year...when she's not there to greet us with open arms.

I made the trip for the funeral by myself. Emma is not well enough to travel on an airplane yet and Henry would have been absolutely miserable to spend 2 days out of 4 traveling. Dan stayed home to take care of the kids so I would be able to go. My brother and sister also went - it felt so right that we could all be together. It was strange being in Farmor's apartment without her. It still smelled the same and I could picture her, rushing around, making sure everyone had enough to eat, answering the phone that was always ringing and keeping busy, always keeping busy. It was so empty now.

My grandmother had planned her funeral and the reception afterward. She was very much at peace knowing that her end was near. She had spoken to my father at length about details such as what hymns she wanted sung. When the meal after the funeral was over, she wanted all of us to stand up and hold hands while singing a song that was special to her. I truly felt that if I had just looked a few seats down that table from me - there Farmor would be, singing along with us.

I cried a lot that weekend.

I am so happy that I have such wonderful memories her - she will always be a big part of my life.

I miss her.

Farmor and me.

Bedtime photo

Emma and Henry in their jamas (as Henry would call them)